Homer Simpson Quotes, Funny Homer Simpson Quotes, Homer Simpson Sayings

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Quotes of the Week - Nov 10, 2009:
"I wish they caught me six years ago, eight years ago." -- Bernie Madoff, jailed financier and Ponzi schemer, in newly released interview with representatives of the US Securities and Exchange Commission.

"This is all happening because my father didn't buy me a train set as a kid." --Warren Buffett, investor, on his company's $26 billion purchase of Burlington Northern Santa Fe railroad - its biggest deal ever.

"I went to sleep as Rihanna and woke up as Britney Spears." -- Rihanna, pop singer, on the unprecedented levels of media attention she endured after she was assaulted by former boyfriend Chris Brown in February.

Authors: Simpsons Quotes - Funny Homer Simpson Quotes Sayings

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Kids, kids. I'm not going to die. That only happens to bad people.
Homer Simpson

Marge, I'm going to miss you so much. And it's not just the sex. It's also the food preparation.
Homer Simpson

Ah, TV respects me. It laughs with me, not at me!"
Homer Simpson

Marge, I agree with you -- in theory. In theory, communism works. In theory.
Homer Simpson

You think I don't want to? It's those TV networks, Marge: they won't let me. One quality show after another, each one fresher and more brilliant than the last. If they only stumbled once, just gave us thirty minutes to ourselves, but they won't! They won't let me live!
Homer Simpson

Television! Teacher, mother, secret lover.
Homer Simpson

I want to shake off the dust of this one-horse town. I want to explore the world. I want to watch TV in a different time zone. I want to visit strange, exotic malls...I want to live, Marge! Won't you let me live?
Homer Simpson

I've always wondered if there was a god. And now I know there is -- and it's me.
Homer Simpson

Lisa honey, are you saying you're never going to eat any animal again? What about bacon?
Homer Simpson

All normal people love meat. If I went to a barbeque and there was no meat, I would say 'Yo Goober! Where's the meat!?'. I'm trying to impress people here Lisa. You don't win friends with salad.
Homer Simpson

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Homer Simpson: Character from The Simpsons TV show, created by American Cartoonist Matt Groening, born 1954.