Dilbert Quotes, Famous Dilbert Quotes Quotations Dilbert Sayings

The ideal Valentine gift! Get our outrageously funny quotes book at -
Amazon.Com
Barnes & Noble

AUTHORS by last name: A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z

Topics - Love - Funny - Friendship - Life - Literary - Top 10 Lists - Quotes of Day - 2012 Quotes

Quotes of the Week - January 17, 2012:
"Our campaign is about more than replacing a President. It is about saving the soul of America." -- Republican Mitt Romney, US presidential hopeful, after winning New Hampshire primary.

"Remember to look up at the stars and not down to your feet. Try to make sense of what you see and wonder about what makes the universe exist. Be curious. And however difficult life may seem, there is always something you can do and succeed at. It matters that you don't just give up." -- Professor Stephen Hawking on his 70th birthday.

"American children had never seen a moving bosom before." -- Actress Celia Imrie on the alarm caused by her low-cut dress in Nanny McPhee.

Authors: Dilbert Quotes, Famous Dilbert Quotes Quotations Sayings

1 2 3 4 5 6

For every person who thinks up a magnificent breakthrough idea, there are a hundred who are nothing more than mindless and unimportant implementers of the idea. The reason for the imbalance in numbers is that the implementers tend to kill the people with the great ideas in order to cut down on the workload.
Dilbert

I get mail; therefore I am.
Dilbert

I respectfully decline the invitation to join your hallucination.
Dilbert

If at first you don't succeed, try again. Then quit. No use being a fool about it.
Dilbert

If you give a man a fish he will eat for a day. But if you teach a man to fish he will buy an ugly hat. And if you talk about fish to a starving man then you are a consultant.
Dilbert

If you have any trouble sounding condescending, find a Unix user to show you how it's done.
Dilbert

If you spend all of your time arguing with people who are nuts, you'll be exhausted and the nuts will still be nuts.
Dilbert

I'll be happy to make these unnecessary changes to this irrelevant document.
Dilbert

I'm slowly becoming a convert to the principle that you can't motivate people to do things, you can only demotivate them. The primary job of the manager is not to empower but to remove obstacles.
Dilbert

In Japan, employees occasionally work themselves to death. It's called Karoshi. I don't want that to happen to anybody in my department. The trick is to take a break as soon as you hear a bright light and hear dead relatives beckon.
Dilbert

1 2 3 4 5 6

Dilbert: Cartoon created by Scott Adams, American cartoonist, born 1957.

Check out our hilarious
2320 Funniest Quotes

Get Quotes of Day on:
Facebook Twitter

Quotes and Pictures NEW

People I Can't Stand

Life is Slippery...

The Good Sex Guide