Chris Griffin: What did you get from your boyfriends?
Meg Griffin: Oh you know from my boyfriend, Prince William,
I got this beautiful watch, and this diamond tiara, and a sceptre...[goes
crazy and runs away crying]
Stewie: She needs to get laid BIG TIME!
Family Guy |
Lois Griffin: I'm gonna go get some oranges Stewie. Here,
hold the rest of these bags for mommy.
Stewie Griffin: Oh, what brilliant parenting Lois. Leave a tiny
infant with a plastic bag. You know I might asphyxiate myself
just to teach you a lesson. Here I go. Just like that boy from
INXS…[Stewie tries to put bag over top of his head.] I'm
going to do it! [Tries to put bag over left side of his head
then climbs into it and tries pulling it over his head.] BLAST!
Good Lord Lois, either I was a c-section, or you're Wonder Woman!
Family Guy |
[In car with Brian, says to police officer] We met on the
Internet. He lured me into the car with promises of candy and
funny stories.
Stewie Griffin
Family Guy |
By all means, turn me into a child star. Perhaps I can move
to Californ-i-ay and wrangle me a three-way with the Olsen twins.
Stewie Griffin
Family Guy |
Do the women there have exposed clitorati?
Stewie Griffin
Family Guy |
Stewie Griffin [picking a booger]: Does this not disgust you?
Brian Griffin: Kid, you're talkin' to a guy who uses his tongue
for toilet paper.
Family Guy |
Lois Griffin [finding note in Chris's pocket]: Huh, what's
this? You know Stewie, Mommy doesn't usually read things out
of Chris's pocket. She's more respectful than that.
Stewie Griffin: Whatever helps you sleep at night, bitch.
Family Guy |
Lois Griffin: Oh, I haven't been on a college campus in years.
Everything seems so different.
Stewie Griffin: Really? Perhaps if you laid on your back with
your ankles behind your ears that would ring a few bells.
Family Guy |
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