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2009 Quotes of the Year - Top Quotes of 2009

Quotes of the Week - Dec 31, 2009:
"We are ending our sponsorship agreement with Tiger Woods and wish him well in the future." -- AT&T in a statement about dropping its endorsement deal with the golf player after revelations of his multiple extramarital affairs.

"We say Obamanough already." -- Lake Superior State University, responsible for issuing the 35th annual list of overused words they believe should be banned. Topping the list is the practice of adding Obama - to related topics to create terms such as 'Obamacare' and 'Obamanomics'.

"This is an honor that embraces those actors, directors and creative teams who have in these recent years helped fill my life with inspiration, companionship and sheer fun." -- Actor Patrick Stewart, who has been knighted in Queen Elizabeth II's New Year honors list.

Quotes of the Week - Dec 29, 2009:
"A parcel of any shape or form has never been safe with me and I fear that William has also picked up this dreadful habit from his mother, as I find wrapping paper undone in the most extraordinary places!" -- In a previously unseen letter, Princess Diana confesses that she opens Christmas presents early.

"My advice, as a Christian priest, is to shoplift." -- Anglican priest Rev Tim Jones of St Lawrence Church, York, tells parishioners it "is permissible for those who are in desperate situations to take food that they might not starve."

Quotes of the Week - Dec 22, 2009:
"I'm amazed by the fact that I'm out on tour and know nothing - I'm beginning to think I must have my head in a hole or something." -- Golfer Padraig Harrington on the Tiger Woods affairs scandal.

"There's a part of me that's glad to see the back of me." -- Broadcaster Terry Wogan to listeners on his last BBC radio show.

"I'm 47, how am I supposed to look." -- Demi Moore, after being told on Twitter she looked old.

Quotes of the Week - Dec 15, 2009:
"I am deeply aware of the disappointment and hurt that my infidelity has caused to so many people, most of all my wife and children." -- Golfer Tiger Woods, on his affairs with other women, in a message posted on his website.

"Don't hold your breath." -- Vladimir Putin, Russian Prime Minister, asked if he had any plans to retire soon.

"I've lost a lot of roles because of my height. I'm 6ft 3in in heels. Producers are short and I was never their sexual fantasy." -- Sigourney Weaver on the heightists of Hollywood.

"I think it's been years." -- Robert Gates, US Defense Secretary, on last time he received good intelligence on whereabouts of Osama bin Laden.

"That's the psychotic part of me. I don't take them off for many interviews, but I'll take them off for you because I love you." -- Lady Gaga, pop star, to Barbara Walters, on why she always covers her face with dark glasses.

Quotes of the Week - Dec 8, 2009:
"I have let my family down, and I regret those transgressions with all of my heart. I have not been true to my values and the behavior my family deserves." -- Tiger Woods, responding to allegations of extramarital affairs.

"I consider my entire movie career a failure. The goal of movie-making is to star in a film where your performance drives the film and the film is either a soaring critical or commercial success, and I never had that." -- Alec Baldwin, vowing to quit acting in 2012.

"It is no more acceptable to make a fat joke than to make a gay joke. People need to learn to take everyone as they are." -- Dawn French, British comedienne.

Quotes of the Week - Dec 1, 2009:
"Nothing tastes as good as skinny feels." -- Model Kate Moss, asked if she had a personal motto. Her statement drew fire from eating-disorder experts.

"I was shouting, but no one could hear me." -- Rom Houben, a Belgian man who was mistakenly presumed to be in a coma for 23 years after becoming paralyzed in a car crash. A recent journal article revealed that doctors, using new scanning techniques, discovered in 2006 that Housen, who could not speak, had normal brain function. He now communicates using a special keyboard.

"I handled it - I admit it - but I'm not the referee." -- Thierry Henry, French soccer star, on handball that led to the game-tying goal against Ireland and earned France a place in next year's World Cup finals.

Quotes of the Week - Nov 24, 2009:
"Lesbians make better parents than a man and a woman." -- Stephen Scott, of the British Academy of Parenting Practitioners.

"How can I kick myself? There are other people to be kicked." -- Martha Stewart, when asked about the insider-trading scandal that, by her estimates, cost her company more than a billion dollars.

"I'm not scared of what Khalid Sheikh Mohammed has to say at trial and no one else needs to be, either." -- Eric Holder, US Attorney General, in remarks after a lawyer for one of the five men facing trial in the Sept. 11 attacks announced that the men would plead not guilty so that they can air their criticisms of U.S. foreign policy.

"You keep kicking people, and people will leave. Simple as that." -- Richard Daley, Chicago mayor, saying Oprah Winfrey is ending her show because of how she's criticized in the media.

Quotes of the Week - Nov 17, 2009:
"I owe 30% to genes, 30% to good sex, 30% because of a healthy lifestyle. For the remaining 10%, I have to thank my plastic surgeon." -- Jane Fonda on looking good at 71.

"The entire market crashed. You can't blame that on two people." --Aram Hong, member of jury that acquitted two former Bear Stearns hedge-fund managers on charges of securities fraud.

"They are either Mariah Carey or Whitney Houston or Boyzone - televised karoake." -- Sting is unimpressed by contestants on Britain's X Factor.

"You can achieve your goal if you persistently pursue it." -- Cha Sa-Soon, 68-year-old South Korean woman who passed her country's written driver's license exam on her 950th try.

Quotes of the Week - Nov 10, 2009:
"I wish they caught me six years ago, eight years ago." -- Bernie Madoff, jailed financier and Ponzi schemer, in newly released interview with representatives of the US Securities and Exchange Commission.

"This is all happening because my father didn't buy me a train set as a kid." --Warren Buffett, investor, on his company's $26 billion purchase of Burlington Northern Santa Fe railroad - its biggest deal ever.

"I went to sleep as Rihanna and woke up as Britney Spears." -- Rihanna, pop singer, on the unprecedented levels of media attention she endured after she was assaulted by former boyfriend Chris Brown in February.

Quotes of the Week - Nov 3, 2009:
"I have trouble listening to what he says sometimes because of the blood that drips from his teeth while he's talking." -- Alan Grayson, Democratic Congressman from Florida, likens former VP Dick Cheney to a vampire, after Cheney criticized President Barack Obama's handling of the war in Afghanistan.

"I didn't betray him. He betrayed me. He betrayed the thousands of us who suffered." --Juanita Castro, younger sister of former Cuban President Fidel Castro, revealing in a new memoir that she worked undercover for the CIA during the 1060s.

"She has no waist, an interesting face, but all we are really worshipping is two bags of silicone." -- Martin Amis, on topless model and fellow author Jordan.

Quotes of the Week - Oct 27, 2009:
"The Nobel Peace Prize is the rest of the world saying, 'Don't blow it'." -- Bono on Barack Obama's award of the Nobel Prize.

"I would do the baby voice and it's kind of like this character I made up. But in real life, I'm completely different. I'm very smart. I think a lot of people will assume I'm an airhead." -- Paris Hilton.

"I've been in relationships where I've felt terribly alone. Just because you're with someone, it doesn't mean you're happy." -- Actor George Clooney.

Quotes of the Week - Oct 20, 2009:
"To work out how to operate a television set, you practically have to make love to the thing." -- Prince Philip, the 88-year-old British royal, complaining about the difficulty of using modern remote controls.

"Nobody wants to see a round woman." -- Karl Lagerfeld, clothing designer, after Brigitte, one of Germany's top-selling women's magazines, barred professional models from its pages in favor of "real women".

"She is a stunning example of the cartoon form." -- James Jellinek, editorial director of Playboy, on the decision to feature Marge Simpson on the magazine's November cover. The character will be Playboy's first cartoon cover girl.

Quotes of the Week - Oct 13, 2009:
"This is only phase one of the scandal. Phase two: I go on Oprah and sob." -- David Letterman makes light of being blackmailed for having sex with his staff.

"I think I'd rather get run over by a train." -- Madonna on whether she plans to marry again. The singer recently finalized her divorce from film director Guy Ritchie.

"Sweat is my sanity." -- Sarah Palin on the joys of jogging.

"I kind of like being a President." -- Hillary Clinton, US Secretary of State, presiding over UN Security Council hearing on sexual violence against women.

Quotes of the Week - Oct 6, 2009:
"People might make predictions of who might win, but one never expects it. It's like the Monty Python sketch, 'Nobody expects the Spanish Inquisition!'" -- Carol W. Greider, one of three Americans won won the 2009 Nobel Prize in medicine for discovering a key mechanism in the genetic operations of cells.

"I urge you to choose Chicago. I urge you to choose America." -- US President Barack Obama in his pitch to the International Olympic Committee in Copenhagen for 2016 Summer Games to be awarded to his hometown. The games went to Rio de Janeiro.

"Some employees may prefer weapons such as chain saws, baseball bats and explosives that have been shown to be effective against zombies." -- University of Florida in a disaster preparedness plan on its e-Learning website on how to deal with a campus-wide zombie attack.

"This morning, I did something I've never done in my life. I had to go downtown and testify before a grand jury." -- David Letterman, host of The Late Show, during the taping of Oct. 1's show revealing that he was a victim of a $2 million extortion attempt related to his sexual relationships with female staffers.

Quotes of the Week - Sept 29, 2009:
"Please pick up after yourself. You left your underwear on the floor again." -- Michelle Obama in a Post-It note to her husband, according to a book on their marriage.

"Barbie has evolved from a toy into an intellectual property." -- Spokesman for Mattel explains why Barbie is now ready to do her first movie

"Women just retain control of the remote at all times. Once we loosen our grip, men will watch golf and war and complicated American dramas full of people mumbling." -- Comedian Jenny Sinclair wants to keep her finger on the button.

"We are facing a worldwide tsunami of Alzheimer's and other diseases." -- Author Terry Pratchett, who is suffering from a rare form of the disease

Quotes of the Week - Sept 22, 2009:
"We're going to have no paper, no printing plants, no unions. It's going to be great." -- Media mogul Rupert Murdoch, hailing prospect of electronic devices like Amazon Kindle displacing newspapers, a process he estimates will take about 20 years.

"I don't know why she would have feel threatened." -- Serena Williams, tennis player, downplaying her profane tirade directed towards a lineswoman who called a foot fault against her during the deciding game of US Open women's semifinal match.

"Limits, like fears, are often just an illusion." -- Michael Jordan, in speech marking his induction into Basketball Hall of Fame.

Quotes of the Week - Sept 15, 2009:
"We asked ourselves what face we could give to the virus, and it couldn't be a pretty face." -- Dirk Silz, creative director of Germany's new "AIDS Is a Mass Murderer" campaign, on choice of Adolf Hitler as virus's human embodiment.

"I will take questions from the guys but from the girls I want telephone numbers." -- Silvio Berlusconi, Italian prime minister, addresses youth rally in Rome.

"I see it all as a joke. It doesn't upset me. God made me the way I am and I accept myself. I am who I am and I'm proud of myself. I'd like to dress up more often and wear dresses, but I never get the chance." -- Caster Semenya, gold medal winner at World Athletics Championships, whose gender is in question.

"We would have said: 'We'll take those three but probably lose the drummer.'" -- Simon Cowell on why the Beatles would have failed in the X-Factor.

Quotes of the Week - Sept 8, 2009:
"We are beating ourselves up over this." -- Warren Rupf, sheriff of California's Contra Costa County, admitting his department missed chance in 2006 of rescuing Jaycee Lee Dugard, who was held in a backyard prison for 18 years.

"Genius...sometimes consists of knowing when to stop." -- George Will, conservative commentator, citing Charles de Gaulle's maxim in his argument that US should withdraw from Afghanistan.

"If he gets shot, it's too damn bad." -- Richard Nixon, indicating he would rescind Ted Kennedy's Secret Service bodyguards after 1972 presidential election; according to recently transcribed Oval Office tapes, Nixon afforded Kennedy protection in part so the agency could spy on the Senator and expressed disappointment when an aide reported that Kennedy was "very clean".

Quotes of the Week - Sept 1, 2009:
"There's not a day goes by that I do not feel remorse." -- William Calley, former US Army lieutenant, offering his first public apology for his role in 1968 My Lai massacre.

"Hedgehogs - why can't they just share the hedge." -- Dan Antopolski, London stand-up comedian, won award for funniest joke at Edinburgh this year.

"I want simply to learn about the world and to live freely." -- Laura Dekker, 13-year-old schoolgirl taken into care to stall her bid to become youngster person to sail solo around world.

"You'll never see me smile on court." -- Tennis pro Andy Murray.

"I read in The New York Times this week that I'm an ice queen, I'm the Sun King, I'm an alien fleeing from District 9 and I'm a dominatrix. So I reckon that makes me a lukewarm royalty with a whip from outer space." -- Anna Wintour, editor of US Vogue, tells chat-show host David Letterman why she has such a frosty reputation.

Quotes of the Week - August 25, 2009:
"It's only stalking if the other person doesn't like it." -- Tennis star Andy Roddick admits he stalked his swimsuit-model bride during their courtship.

"Bernie was a release valve, someone I could disappear with for a few hours. Somebody who would say nice things to me and treat me like a lady...he opened doors for me, stood when I entered restaurants and was never short of compliments." -- Sheryl Weinstein, mistress of fraudster Bernie Madoff.

"Think what I'd have had to pay Alyce if she'd contributed anything to the relationship." -- John Cleese on his latest divorce.

"I know some people will see the irony here." -- Rodney king, whose beating by Los Angeles policemen sparked the city's 1992 riots, on his plan to box a former police officer in a paid bout on Sept 12.

"It's not for the chicken to speak of his own soup." -- Quentin Tarantino, asked if his latest movie Inglourious Basterds was his masterpiece.

Quotes of the Week - August 18, 2009:
"You want me to tell you what my husband thinks? My husband is not Secretary of State. I am. You ask my opinion. I'll tell you my opinion. I'm not going to channel my husband." -- Hillary Clinton, to Congolese student who asked her "What does Mr Clinton think, through the mouth of Mrs Clinton." The student had meant to say "Mr Obama".

"I wouldn't be here if it weren't for the NHS [National Health Service]. I have received a large amount of high quality treatment, without which I would not have survived." -- Professor Stephen Hawking.

"Why do they call you beautiful?" -- Victoria Beckham's reported response to Naomi Campbell's question: "Why do they call you Posh?

Quotes of the Week - August 11, 2009:
"I love cigarettes. Love them. I think the more positive approach you have to smoking, the less harmful it is." -- Actress Sienna Miller.

"My hairdos have been the subject of PhD theses, so I want everybody to9 know that I got a good one in Nairobi." -- Hillary Clinton.

"The sex workers' unexpected prominence on this list of honor is indeed unusual. Yet given the constant feed of scandals involving the country's elite, this is not bad at all. At least they have not slid into the least credible category, which consists of real estate developers, secretaries, agents, entertainers and directors." -- Chinese poll which showed that prostitutes are trusted more than Govt. officials and politicians.

Quotes of the Week - August 4, 2009:
"I had to hold my nose and stop those firms from failing." -- Ben Bernanke, US Fed chairman, citing fears of a second Great Depression to explain why he used taxpayer money to bail out firms like AIG last fall.

"The trouble with Twitter, the instantness of it, too many twits might make a twat." -- David Cameron, British Conservative Party leader.

"I'm a human being. I had a bout of fatigue. Was it due to dehydration, tiredness? I don't know. I like sport a lot. The doctor says it's necessary that I be able to continue, but in a reasonable manner. I've always paid attention to what I eat and I'm going to keep that up. I just need to rest." -- French president Nicolas Sarkozy after his collapse while jogging.

"It don't spit or swear or sleep around. I've always maintained I'm the most radical rock'n'roll singer Britain has ever seen." -- Cliff Richard.

"Perhaps the Lord wanted to teach me more patrience and humility, give me more time for prayer and meditation. Unfortunately my own guardian angel did not prevent my injury." -- Pope Benedict on fall that broke his wrist.

Quotes of the Week - July 28, 2009:
"Why? Because I'm a black man in America?" -- Harvard professor Henry Louis Gates Jr. accusing police officer of racism during robbery investigation; Gates was trying to pry open front door of his home in Cambridge, Mass., when onlooker called 911.

"It was love and it ended." -- Marriage in a netshell, by glamour model Jordan.

"Isn't it time to continue our journey ... beyond the moon.'" -- Buzz Aldrin, lunar astronaut.

"There are tons of good-looking girls out there. I am not a saint. But you all know that. I hope those at La Repubblica newspaper also understand it." -- Italian premier Silvio Berlusconi on latest allegations in La Repubblica that he paid call girls for sex.

Quotes of the Week - July 21, 2009:
"My play on those words fell flat. It was bad." -- Sonia Sotomayor, US Supreme Court nominee, explaining that her remark about a "wise Latina" alluded to retired Justice Sandra Day O'Connor's adage about wise men and women reaching the same verdict.

"I am known as 'invisible man.'" -- Ban Ki-Moon, after recent poll found that 81% of Americans either had no opinion of UN Secretary-General or had never heard of him.

"I'd like to see Mars become the focus, just as John F. Kennedy focused on the moon." -- Michael Collins, Apollo 11 command-module pilot, on eve of 40th anniversary of man's first landing on the moon.

"It would have been a hell of a story, wouldn't it?" -- Tom Watson, US golfer, after losing playoff to Stewart Cink, thus denying him sixth British Open title at 59.

Quotes of the Week - July 14, 2009:
"If I die, I die. So be it." -- Sarah Palin, on her political future after announcing July 3 she would resign as Alaska governor Alaska at end of month.

"It was great shaking my hand today. I thoroughly enjoyed that." -- Tiger Woods, after winning the AT&T National, a golf tournament that benefits his charitable foundation.

"Financiers must rediscover the genuinely ethical foundation of their activity.'" -- Pope Benedict XVI, calls for global economic reform in July 6 encyclical.

"No matter what Michael wanted, someone would give it. The very rich, the very poor and the very famous get the worst medical care." -- Dr Arnold Klein, Michael Jackson's dermatologist.

Quotes of the Week - July 7, 2009:
"I left a legacy of shame. It is something I will live with for the rest of my life." -- Bernard Madoff, the disgraced financier, apologizing at US court hearing where he was sentenced to 150 in prison for fraud.

"I'm glad there's justice, but unfortunately, my life has been ruined." -- Sharon Lissauer, New York woman who lost her life savings to convicted swindler Bernard Madoff.

"He said, 'I just want to get some sleep. You don't understand. I just want to be able to be knocked out and go to sleep.'" -- Cherilyn Lee, nurse claiming that Michael Jackson suffered severe insomnia and once asked for powerful sedative Diprivan.

"I wish it was me." -- Jermaine Jackson, on his brother Michael's death.

Quotes of the Week - June 30, 2009:
"I can't stop crying over the sad news. I've always admired Michael Jackson - the world has lost one of its greats, but his music will live on forever" -- Madonna, reacting to death of Michael Jackson.

"Part of my soul has gone with him." -- Quincy Jones, who produced Thriller, on Michael Jackson, who died unexpectedly at age of 50.

"Nobody can tell me to stop grunting. I would rather get fined than lose a match because I had to stop." -- Tennis player Michelle Larcher de Brito, whose grunts have been measured at 109 decibels.

"I have only two passions: space exploration and hip-hop." -- Astronaut Buzz Aldrin, 79, who is producing a single with rapper Snoop Dogg.

Quotes of the Week - June 23, 2009:
"What's up London?" -- Britney Spears addressing audience at her show in Manchester.

"It's time to heal the wounds of the monument with the return of the marbles which belong to it." -- Carolos Papoulias, Greek President, renewing demands to Britain to return Parthenon statues taken nearly 200 years ago.

"Protesting against lies and fraud is your right." -- Mir-Hossein Mousavi, Iranian opposition leader, defying country's Supreme Leader by supporting protests of the disputed presidential election.

"The burqa is not a religious sign; it's a sign of subservience, a sign of debasement." -- Nicolas Sarkozy, French President, announcing the Muslim burqa would not be welcome in France.

Quotes of the Week - June 16, 2009:
"How many people would laugh if they were effectively described as an old, ugly pig? How is that funny exactly? And worse, it's not even witty ... We all know that no one takes them on. I am not going to sit meekly and let some arrogant narcissist bully me." -- Tracy Grimshaw, Australian TV star, portrayed as a fat sow by chef Gordon Ramsay. Ramsay later apologized claiming his mother had given him a "bollocking" for his rudeness. His mother, however, said that she had not spoken to him.

"Dad would be playing the guitar and we'd be, like: 'Dad, can you stop it? We're trying to watch EastEnders." -- Mary McCartney on family life with Sir Paul.

"I think that women are afraid to say they don't want children because they're going to get shunned." -- Cameron Diaz.

Quotes of the Week - June 9, 2009:
"Do you take a shower in a jacket and tie?" -- Silvio Berlusconi, Italian Prime Minister, to radio interviewer when quizzed about photos of topless women sunbathing at his Sardinia estate.

"I don't know anything about cars." -- Edward Whitacre Jr., newly appointed chairman of GM, who added that "a business is a business, and I think I can learn".

"I have come here to seek a new beginning between the United States and Muslims around the world, one based upon mutual interest and mutual respect. America and Islam are not exclusive and need not be in competition. America is not - and never will be at war with Islam." -- Barack Obama in Cairo university.

Quotes of the Week - June 2, 2009:
"I pushed him off because jumpers like Chen are very selfish. Their actions violate a lot of public interests. They do not really dare kill themselves." -- Lai Jiansheng, who pushed a man threatening suicide off a bridge in China after he had held up traffic for five hours.

"It was needless hugging ... it wasn't a greeting. It was happening all day." -- Noreen Hajinlian, principal of New Jersey middle school that has banned hugging.

"What no private plane? lol Generous offer! Thank you!" -- Actress Demi Moore accepting offer via Twitter to fly first class from U.S. to support underdog singer Susan Boyle in finals of talent show Britain's Got Talent.

Quotes of the Week - May 26, 2009:
"Sexual abuse was endemic in boys institutions." -- Report of the Commission to Inquire into Child Abuse in 216 institutions run by Catholic Church in Ireland between 1930 and 1990 and supposedly inspected by the Department of Education.

"To me it's sexier when it doesn't look like you go to the gym. I feel best when I'm not really thin and not really heavy - when I'm still curvy." -- Beyonce Knowles.

"There are so many advertisements now telling people they need to look a certain way and have this perfect life. They feel they should be getting up at six in the morning and going to the gym, then doing a full day's work and coming back late and have to feed 12 people for dinner. It's a modern disease." -- Bridget Jones author, Helen Fielding.

Quotes of the Week - May 19, 2009:
"The Pope was never in the Hitler Youth - never never never." -- Vatican spokesman Federico Lombardi.

"We are in this awful youth-driven thing where everybody needs to look 30 at 60, but I'm not fiddling about with myself." -- British actress Emma Thompson says she won't be resorting to plastic surgery.

"I'm a guy who doesn't see anything good having come from the Internet." -- Michael Lynton, CEO of Sony Pictures Entertainment.

"I want to stay alive." -- Farrah Fawcett, in a video diary about the US actress's struggle against cancer.

"She has done nothing wrong." -- Nyan Win, spokesman for Aung San Suu Kyi's political, protesting news that the Burmese human rights advocate and Novel Peace Prize laureate is to be arrested.

Quotes of the Week - May 12, 2009:
"I never thought I'd be on Sesame Street with Elmo and Big Bird. I'm still thrilled. I'm on a high." -- Michelle Obama, US first lady.

"I don't think there is any way of reconciling our marriage and she should be publicly apologizing to me. This is the third time she has done something like this during an election campaign and this time it is too much." -- Italian President Silvio Berlusconi on his wife's claim he "consorted with minors".

"My children won't eat my food. If it's not plastic or out of a box, they're not interested." -- English cook Nigella Lawson.

"You do realize as you grow older that almost nobody knows what they are talking about." -- Fawlty Towers star John Cleese remembers all those TV executives who told him that a comedy set in a hotel would never work.

"Boys in their 20s are a waste of time. They have nothing to offer conversationally. They're immature. I feel like I have a better shot with someone in their 30s." -- US actress Megan Fox.

Quotes of the Week - May 5, 2009:
"If I wasn't up for challenges I'd be out walking my dogs today. I think my dogs need a break." -- Former Man United player Roy Keane returns to soccer as new manager of Ipswich Town FC.

"The way to stay young is to have early nights, give up booze and lie your head off about how old you are." -- Best-selling Australian writer Kathy Lette.

"Are we all going to die oinking?" -- English comedian Frank Skinner on swine flu.

"There's been a subterranean war betwen men and women, which has been won by women." -- Erin Pizey, founder of world's first refuge for battered women.

"The government has taken tax up to 50%; if it goes to 51 I will be back in America." -- British actor Michael Caine.

Quotes of the Week - April 28, 2009:
"If a girl is seen having a drink she's a drunk. If that happens with a guy, it's not portrayed the same way." -- Pop star Lily Allen.

"When you face such an overwhelming challenge as global climate change, it can be daunting - it's kind of like trying to lose weight." -- US Secretary of State Hillary Clinton.

"Kent, Edinburgh, York ... there are many of us all over the place. We come ten a penny." -- Britain's Prince Andrew, Duke of York, after being introduced as Duke of Kent.

"I always have a boyfriend or two. I'm forever wearing the poor chaps out." -- British TV's Green Goddess, on life at 70.

Quotes of the Week - April 21, 2009:
"He's not sleeping in my bed. We set that rule down long ago." -- Barack Obama sets out firm policy guidelines for new American first pooch, Bo.

"I wouldn't mind being resusicated by you." --Silvio Berlusconi, Italian Prime Miinister, to Dr. Fabiola Carrieri while visiting victoms of recent earthquake.

"There's no work for black actors in Hollywood. Men yes, but women haven't caught up yet." -- Whoopi Goldberg isn't happy with Tinseltown.

"The family is pleased the jury rejected the distortion and trashing of Lana Clarkson's life. Actions have consequences and Phil Spector has to face the consequences of of his actions." -- Lawyer for family of Lana Clarkson, the actor murdered by Spector.

Quotes of the Week - April 14, 2009:
"They have medicaments. They have hot food. They have shelter for the night. Of course their current lodgings are a bit temporary. But they should see it like a weekend of camping." -- Italian Prime Minister Silvio Berlusconi whose remarks caused offence to earthquake survivors in emergency camps.

"Fit and comfort are a priority and I like colorful knickers, but most importantly, a great pair of knickers should be taken off with more joy than they were put on." -- Model Elle Macpherson.

"Banks need a good kick up the bum occasionally." -- Australia's finance minister Wayne Swan.

"I love it when I get whistled at by builders. If they don't, I'll walk past again until they do." -- Actress Su Pollard, aged 59.

Quotes of the Week - April 7, 2009:
"I wonder on what basis anyone can say condoms makes AIDS worse. The Pope must be either stupid, ignorant or dim. If people take his words seriously he will be responsible for the deaths of thousands." -- Prof. Richard Dawkins attacks Pope Benedict's stand on condom use in Africa.

"We took a ride around the land and it was a loooot of fun." -- Dayana Mendoza, the Venezeualan reigning Miss Universe, enjoys a day out at the "beautiful" Guantanamo Bay.

"I am an international leader, the dean of the Arab rulers, the king of kings of Africa, and the imam of Muslims. My status does not allow me to descent to a lower level." -- Col. Gadaffi of Libya, at a meeting of Arab leaders in Qatar.

"He's got these really intense in his forehead. He swears a lot." -- Why Peaches Geldof fancies Gordon Ramsey.

Quotes of the Week - March 31, 2009:
"I don't know what this says about the online audience." -- US President Barack Obama, commenting on the fact that legalizing marijuana was one of the most popular questions submitted to his online town hall.

"Can't say no one makes money from Twitter now. The NBA does." -- Mark Cuban, owner of the Dallas Mavericks, in a Twitter message, or Tweet, on being fined $25,000 by the NBA for insulting referees using the social online service.

"When people think of Tina Turner, they think of the voice, the hair, but mainly the legs. If I don't get them out, people are disappointed. My legs are still in good shape. They're still holding me up, they're still working." -- Tina Turner on her final world concert tour at 70.

"The Queen ignored me and her husband called me a sponger." -- Simon Cowell describes an encounter at Britain's Royal Variety Show. This version of events is denied by Buckingham Palace.

Quotes of the Week - March 24, 2009:
"My mother didn't want me - she was 42 when she had me - and treated me accordingly. I was beaten." -- Austrian Josef Fritzl, who imprisoned his daughter in cellar for 24 years and fathered seven children with her, explains himself.

"In the end this is a symptom of a larger problem - a bubble-and-bust economy that valued reckless speculation over responsibility and hard work." -- US President Barack Obama expresses anger at $165 million in bonuses insurance giant AIG plans to pay executives, even though company has been given a $180 billion taxpayers' bailout to stay afloat.

"Aids is a tragedy that cannot be overcome by money alone, and that cannot be overcome through the distribution of condoms, which even aggravates the problem." -- Pope Benedict.

Quotes of the Week - March 17, 2009:
"I am deeply sorry and ashamed ... I knew what I was doing was wrong, indeed criminal." -- New York financier Bernard Madoff, who swindled investors and charities out of $65 billion.

"He [Madoff] is going to be sentenced for 150 yuars. I hope he lives a long life." -- Richard Friedman, an accountant who lost more than $3 million.

"I know I will fall asleep and not wake up again." -- UK reality TV star Jade Goody, dying of cancer.

"Never being able to say 'Mummy' again in your life seems a small thing. However, for many, including me, it's now really just a word - hollow and evoking only memories." -- Prince William on Princess Diana.

Quotes of the Week - March 10, 2009:
"'This is it' really means this is it." -- Michael Jackson announcing plans for a series of 'final curtain call' concerts, starring in London in July, his first major live performance in 12 years.

"I am prepared to take my fair share of the green revolution on my shoulders but I am less keen on having it on my face." -- British business secretary Lord Mandelson on being 'slimed' when an environmental activist threw green goo at him.

"We are telling the colonialists we are not succumbing; we are not submitting. We will not kneel." -- Sudan hardman and indicted war criminal, General Omar al-Bashir.

"There is no bad guy and there is no good guy. There are no villains and there is no heroine in this story." -- Jennifer Anniston on the break up of her marriage to Brad Pitt who left her for Angelina Jolie.

"I find it a bit creepy if you're having sex with people the same age as your children." -- Jerry Hall in what is seen as reference to former husband Mick Jagger.

Quotes of the Week - March 3, 2009:
"It's the inhumanity of this man — that he can go around depriving people of their livelihoods." -- Elie Wiesel, Novel Peace Prize winner, on swindler Bernie Madoff, whose Ponzi scheme wiped out $15.2m from the Holocaust survivor's charitable foundation.

"It's the holy grail of comic books." -- Stephen Fishler, owner of Comic Connect, on the unrestored copy of Action Comics No. I, the original "Superman and Friend", priced at about $400,000.

"This behavior is shameful." -- Actor Jackie Chan, on Christie's $36 million sale of two animal heads stolen by China's Summer Palace in 1860.

"People have lost their sense of humor. In former times, we constantly made jokes about different races." -- Clint Eastwood doesn't want to be politically correct.

"I promise you, I get it. I will not spend a single penny for the purpose of rewarding a single Wall Street executive." -- US President Barack Obama.

Quotes of the Week - February 24, 2009:
"You can't ask a fantasy writer not to want a knighthood. You know, for two pins I'd get myself a horse and a sword." -- British Author Terry Pratchett on being honored by Queen.

"I'm going to go and take a lot of pictures and show them to people over here." -- Rubina Ali, nine-year-old star of Slumdog Millionaire, on setting off for the Oscars.

"Women should make themselves up, always. Natural is flat, empty, ugly. I believe that cosmetic surgery is nearly a necessity for women now." -- French fashion designer Sonia Rykiel.

"Why should I have that guy running down the country? Who the fuck is he?" -- British Business Secretary Peter Mandelson on Starbucks owner Howard Schultz saying British economy was in a spiral.

"A lot of people are scared of him, not just because of his position but because of his temper. I don't think he ever had time for la dolce vita." -- Carla Bruni on her husband Nicolas Sarkozy.

Quotes of the Week - February 17, 2009:
"This package that he's going to sign is our bridge over troubled waters." -- Bill Clinton, former president, praising Obama's economic recovery plan in an interview with NBC's Today.

"I am committed, with God's help, to emerging a better person." -- Chris Brown, R&B star, expressing regret over his arrest last weekend on suspicion of attacking a woman widely believed to be the pop star Rihanna.

"I've had 15 boob jobs. I've changed my eyes and nose, had facelifts. I've had so many operations I can't feel my stomach, my left breast or anything under my right arm." -- English glamor model Alicia Douvall, who is addicted to cosmetic surgery.

"This is the worst economic crisis in the post-war era. There is no doubt about it." -- Kaoru Yosano, Japan's Economic and Fiscal Policy Minister, after Tokyo announced that GNP fell by 3.3% in last quarter of 2008, the nation's worst figures since the 1970s.

"I say, Life is hard, move on. If you can't get over it, it's ruined." -- Alec Greven, the 9-year-old author of How to Talk to Girls, on being dumped. The young love guru offers romantic advice in his New York Times best-selling book.

Quotes of the Week - February 10, 2009:
"It was the worst sickening, pit-of-your-stomach, falling-through-the-floor feeling I've ever felt in my life." -- Sully Sullenberger, pilot of US Airways Flight 1549, who landed it on the Hudson River last month with no fatalities, revealing the sensations he experienced as his aircraft suffered dual-engine failure.

"He disappointed so many people." -- USA Swimming, in a statement that Olympic champion Michael Phelps is banned from competition for three months after a British newspaper published a photograph of him smoking marijuana.

"It's definitely not what I wanted, and it's clearly not what my mom wanted." -- Michael Phelps, Olympic gold medalist, on the publication of a photograph showing him smoking a marijuana bong.

"I screwed up." -- US President Barack Obama, admitting errors over his handling of the tax controversy that led Tom Daschle to withdraw his nomination for Secretary of Health and Human Services.

"Building and moving quickly for five years hasn't been easy, and we aren't finished." -- Mark Zuckerberg, founder of Facebook, in a blog post celebrating the social-networking site's fifth birthday.

Quotes of the Week - February 3, 2009:
"James Bond is an imperialist, misogynist sociopath who goes around bedding women, swilling martinis and killing people. He's repulsive." -- Actor Matt Damon who plays rival action hero Jason Bourne.

"It's such a relief to let myself be ugly." -- Life was so tiresome as a sex symbol, complains actress Greta Scacchi.

"I am a man who needs love. Every man needs love. Guys like romance. I do anyway." -- All you need is love, says Paul McCartney.

"It's Gordon ... Gordon Ramsay?" -- Paris Hilton, asked to name Britain's Prime Minister.

Quotes of the Week - January 27, 2009:
"I always wanted to kill Hitler. I hated him. As a child studying history and looking at documents, I wondered why didn't someone stand up and try to stop him." -- Tom Cruise on his new movie Valkyrie.

"I would urge you to sell any sterling you might have ... It's finished." -- Jim Rogers, US investment guru.

"Slide down the bannister of the solarium, have swimming parties , play sardines on the White House Lawn." -- George Bush's daughters Barbara and Jenna offer advice to Malia and Sasha Obama about life in the White House.

"Women are the last group anyone cares about in Hollywood." -- Meryl Streep.

"We were aware the animal was unpredictable and it is being treated with pills for depression." -- Bernadette Chirac, wife of former French president Jacques Chirac who was mauled by his pet poodle Sumo.

Quotes of the Week - January 20, 2009:
"Know that America is a friend of each nation and every man, woman and child who seeks a future of peace and dignity, and that we are ready to lead once more." -- Barack Obama, US President, in inaugural address.

"Daddy, the plane turned into a boat." -- Martin Sosa, New Yorker who was with his family on the US Airways flight that ditched in the Hudson River, quotes his 4-year-old daughter's reaction to the emergency landing.

"When I get home tonight and look in the mirror, I am not going to regret what I see. Except maybe some gray hair." George Bush, to supporters in Texas after President Obama's inauguration.

Quotes of the Week - January 13, 2009:
"Defenseless populations are always the ones who pay. Look at the conditions in Gaza. More and more it resembles a big concentration camp." -- Vatican Cardinal Renato Martino.

"Shakespeare has too many lines." -- James Bond star Daniel Craig, why he won't be do the classics.

"I know lots of people that take cocaine three nights a week and get up and go to work every day, no problem. But we never hear that side of the story." -- Singer Lily Allen.

"By day I'm a film star, by night my mum nags me to tidy my room." -- Slumdog Millionaire star Dev Patel.

Quotes of the Week - January 6, 2009:
"I want to quote Colonel Kilgore in Apocalypse Now when he says 'Some day, captain, this war is going to end.'" -- London Mayor Boris Johnson predicts that some day the recession will end.

"I don't go to the gym but I do Pilates workout DVDs for 20 minutes or more every day at home." -- Kate Winslet reveals secret behind her new slimline figure.

"If there ever comes a day when Steve wants to retire or for other reasons cannot continue to fulfill his duties as Apple's CEO, you will know it." -- Apple, in statement responding to rumors about failing health of company's CEO Steve Jobs.

"Stop wearing a suit and tie to bed." - Former US Republican presidential hopeful Mitt Romney, when asked about his New Year's resolutions.

"We are heartbroken that our time with him was so brief." -- John Travolta on death of his 16-year-old son Jett.

"You need to know that both Levi and Bristol are working their butts off to parent and going to school and working at the same time. -- Alaska governor Sarah Palin, leaving phone message at a US gossip magazine after its lurid reporting about her daughter and future son-in-law.

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