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Topic: Dog Quotes - Funny Dog Quotes, Quotations, Sayings about Dogs & Puppies
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Related Quotes:  Cats  Horses  Birds  Animals

On the Internet, nobody knows you're a dog.
Cartoon by Peter Steiner

If dogs could talk, perhaps we would find it as hard to get along with them as we do with people.
Karel Capek

If your dog is fat, you aren't getting enough exercise.
Author unknown

To his dog, every man is Napoleon; hence the constant popularity of dogs.
Aldous Huxley

When a man's best friend is his dog, that dog has a problem.
Edward Abbey

A dog is the only thing on earth that loves you more than you love yourself.
Josh Billings

In order to keep a true perspective of one's importance, everyone should have a dog that will worship him and a cat that will ignore him.
Dereke Bruce

If you want sex, have an affair. If you want a relationship, buy a dog.
Julia Burchill

I loathe people who keep dogs. They are cowards who haven't got the guts to bite people themselves.
August Strindberg

The great pleasure of a dog is that you may make a fool of yourself with him and not only will he not scold you, but he will make a fool of himself too.
Samuel Butler

It's a rough-haired canary.
Mrs. Pat Campbell
To a customs officer who found her pet Pekinese smuggled in her muff.

Money will buy you a pretty good dog, but it won't buy the wag of his tail.
Josh Billings

Life is a series of dogs.
George Carlin

When dogs leap onto your bed, it's because they adore being with you. When cats leap onto your bed, it's because they adore your bed.
Alisha Everett

It is well to love even a dog when you have the opportunity, for fear you should find nothing else worth loving.
Louise Honorine de Choiseul

Our dog died from licking our wedding picture.
Phyllis Diller

My dog is worried about the economy because Alpo is up to 99 cents a can. That's almost $7.00 in dog money.
Joe Weinstein

I named my dog 'Stay' . . . so I can say "Come here, Stay. Come here, Stay."
Steven Wright

Some days you're the dog; some days you're the hydrant.
Author unknown

Sooner or later we're all someone's dog.
Terry Pratchett

A house without either a cat or a dog is the house of a scoundrel.
Portuguese Proverb

Anybody who hates dogs and children can't be all bad.
Leo Rosten
From a testimonial speech about W. C. Fields.

There are three faithful friends - an old wife, an old dog, and ready money.
Benjamin Franklin

Just give me a comfortable couch, a dog, a good book, and a woman. Then if you can get the dog to go somewhere and read the book, I might have a little fun!
Groucho Marx

Some of my best leading men have been dogs and horses.
Elizabeth Taylor

Dogs have so many friends because they wag their tails, not their tongues.

Dogs, the foremost snobs in creation, are quick to notice the difference between a well-clad and a disreputable stranger.
Albert Payson Terhune

A dog, I will maintain, is a very tolerable judge of beauty, as appears from the fact that any liberally educated dog does, in a general way, prefer a woman to a man.
Frances Thompson

I've seen a look in dogs' eyes, a quickly vanishing look of amazed contempt, and I am convinced that basically dogs think humans are nuts.
John Steinbeck

If I have any beliefs about immortality, it is that certain dogs I have known will go to heaven, and very, very few persons.
James Thurber

Yesterday I was a dog. Today I'm a dog. Tomorrow I'll probably still be a dog. Sigh! There's so little hope for advancement.
Charles M. Schulz
Snoopy, Peanuts.

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Too much of a good thing