I don’t write shows with dialogue where actors have to memorize dialogue. I write the scenes where we know everything that’s going to happen. There’s an outline of about seven or eight pages, and then we improvise it. – Larry David
I had a wonderful childhood, which is tough because it’s hard to adjust to a miserable adulthood. – Larry David
I’ve been in therapy. I know enough about myself now to know that I really don’t need to know anymore. – Larry David
I gave a funny speech at my wife’s birthday party, and I’m thinking, ‘Hey, I’ve still got it.’ – Larry David
I’m not interested in closure. Some people just have heart attacks and die, right? There’s no closure. – Larry David
I still think of that guy I was without a wife or kids, and I still want to entertain that guy. The lonely guy, the frustrated guy, the guy with no money – this is the guy who needs to laugh. – Larry David
I guess I still feel that I’m a comedian; if I had to pick one thing that I feel like I could do, it would be that. That doesn’t mean that I like it, but I feel that’s what I am. – Larry David
I think that for the most part, when I started doing comedy, it had become very commercialized. – Larry David
No, I am a crier and if people ever saw me privately they would be shocked at what a bowl of mush I am underneath it all. – Larry David
In those days, reserve duty lasted for six years, which, I might add, was three times as long as service in the regular army, although to be perfectly honest, I was unable to fulfill my entire obligation because I was taking acting classes and they said I could skip my last year. – Larry David
The only change I can really see is that I don’t have to shop for pants in stores anymore. – Larry David
When I was living in New York, there was a lot of screaming in my life. I would just get into these altercations all the time. Being in public, dealing with shopkeepers, just trying to cross the street – things like that. – Larry David
Most people are completely unaware of their breath. They violate your space, they have no idea that they have halitosis. – Larry David
My life has changed. I’m not walking around any more wishing I wasn’t me, which was the case at one time. – Larry David