I don’t believe that anybody has come to a conclusion on why something is funny. It’s funny because it’s ridiculous and it’s ridiculous for different reasons at different times. – Jackie Mason
I’ve been watching politics for 35 or 40 years and you just never know. You can have one person win the Iowa caucus and then the whole picture changes ten minutes later. The same thing can happen again after New Hampshire. I have no idea what’s going to happen with our country in the future. – Jackie Mason
I can’t pretend that I’m a great student of the art of comedy because anybody that becomes philosophical about humour doesn’t know what he’s talking about. – Jackie Mason
I have nothing but love in my heart and everything I say is just an instrument for laughs. – Jackie Mason
My material is as new as anything on the dinner table. What difference does it make if I’m 70 or if I’m 20? The audience knows they aren’t getting any old stories from me. – Jackie Mason
It’s no longer a question of staying healthy. It’s a question of finding a sickness you like. – Jackie Mason
It is more profitable for your congressman to support the tobacco industry than your life. – Jackie Mason
