Woody Allen Quotes Quotations, Funny Woody Allen Quotes Sayings

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Quotes of the Week - Aug 24, 2010:
"Barack Obama is the worst President in history." -- Ben Quayle, son of former US Vice President.

"He is a bit old." -- Fabio Capello, England soccer coach, saying he doesn't plan to pick David Beckham, 35, for any more competitive matches.

"I am not on the Earth to be bullied by women journalists who envy my freedom, my courage, my talent and my arse. I have a fantastic arse." -- Sinead O'Connor, singer, resents criticism of her recent wedding.

"I'm no Tom Jones but I'm doing better than Nick Clegg." -- UK X Factor finalist Olly Murs, reveals his sexual conquests now number more than 30.

Authors: Woody Allen Quotes, Funny Woody Allen Quotes, Famous Sayings

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Death is an acquired trait.
Woody Allen
Woody Allen and His Comedy

I don't want to achieve immortality through my work…I want to achieve it through not dying.
Woody Allen
Woody Allen and His Comedy

I took a course in speed reading learning to read straight down the middle of the page, and was able to read War and Peace in twenty minutes. It's about Russia.
Woody Allen
Quote and Unquote

Take the money and run.
Woody Allen
Film title

If only God would give me some clear sign! Like making a large deposit in my name at a Swiss bank.
Woody Allen
Selections from the Allen Notebooks, New Yorker

On bisexuality: It immediately doubles your chances for a date on Saturday night.
Woody Allen
New York Times

I recently turned sixty. Practically a third of my life is over.
Woody Allen
Sayings of the Week, Observer

My problems all started with my early education. I went to a school for mentally disturbed teachers.
Woody Allen

Another good thing about being poor is that when you are seventy your children will not have you declared legally insane in order to gain control of your estate.
Woody Allen

The baby is fine. The only problem is that he looks like Edward G. Robinson.
Woody Allen

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Woody Allen: American movie director, writer, actor. Born 1935.