A
fast word about oral contraception. I asked a girl to sleep
with me and she said 'no'.
Woody Allen
Woody Allen Volume Two |
I
am at two with nature.
Woody Allen
Woody Allen: Clown Prince of American Humor |
Some
guy hit my fender the other day, and I said unto him 'Be fruitful,
and multiply.' But not in those words.
Woody Allen
Woody Allen: Clown Prince of American Humor |
I
wanted to be an arch-criminal as a child, before I discovered
I was too short.
Woody Allen
Woody Allen: Clown Prince of American Humor |
I
asked the girl if she could bring a sister for me. She did.
Sister Maria Teresa. It was a very slow evening. We discussed
the New Testament. We agreed that He was very well adjusted
for an only child.
Woody Allen
Woody Allen: Clown Prince of American Humor |
And
my parents finally realise that I'm kidnapped and they snap
into action immediately: they rent out my room.
Woody Allen
Woody Allen and His Comedy |
My
one regret in life is that I am not someone else.
Woody Allen
Woody Allen and His Comedy |
I'm
short enough and ugly enough to succeed on my own.
Woody Allen
Play it Again Sam |
My
brain - it's my second favorite organ.
Woody Allen
Sleeper |
Q.
Have you ever taken a serious political stand on anything?
A. Yes, for twenty-four hours I refused to eat grapes.
Woody Allen
Sleeper |