W. C. Fields Quotes, Famous W. C. Fields Quotes Quotations Sayings

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Quotes of the Week - November 25, 2008:
"I can't go to my old barber shop now. I've gotta have my barber come to some undisclosed location to cut my hair." -- US President-elect on adjusting to his and his family's new reality and the "certain lonliness to the job" of president.

"Will I be able to have children?" -- Hitler's first question to the doctor who saved his life after a groin injury in the WWI Battle of the Somme. A recently discovered manuscript of a conversation between the doctor and Hitler's priest confirmed the rumor that Hitler lost a testicle in the fight.

"I and others were mistaken early on in saying that the subprime crisis would be contained." -- US Federal Reserve Chairman Ben Bernanke

Authors: W. C. Fields Quotes, Famous W. C. Fields Quotes Quotations Sayings

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If you can't dazzle them with brilliance, baffle them with bull.
W. C. Fields

Secretary: It must be hard to lose your mother-in-law.
W.C. Fields: Yes it is, very hard. It's almost impossible.

It ain't a fit night out for man or beast.
W. C. Fields

It's a funny old world - a man's lucky if he gets out of it alive.
W. C. Fields

It's morally wrong to allow a sucker to keep his money.
W. C. Fields

Lady Godiva put everything she had on a horse.
W. C. Fields

Last week, I went to Philadelphia, but it was closed.
W. C. Fields

Madam, there's no such thing as a tough child - if you parboil them first for seven hours, they always come out tender.
W. C. Fields

More people are driven insane through religious hysteria than by drinking alcohol.
W. C. Fields

My illness is due to my doctor's insistence that I drink milk, a whitish fluid they force down helpless babies.
W. C. Fields

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W. C. Fields - American humorist. Born 1880. Died 1946.