W. C. Fields Quotes, Famous W. C. Fields Quotes Quotations Sayings

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Quotes of the Week - Oct 13, 2009:
"This is only phase one of the scandal. Phase two: I go on Oprah and sob." -- David Letterman makes light of being blackmailed for having sex with his staff.

"I think I'd rather get run over by a train." -- Madonna on whether she plans to marry again. The singer recently finalized her divorce from film director Guy Ritchie.

"Sweat is my sanity." -- Sarah Palin on joys of jogging.

"I kind of like being a President." -- Hillary Clinton, US Secretary of State, presiding over UN Security Council hearing on sexual violence against women.

Authors: W. C. Fields Quotes, Famous W. C. Fields Quotes Quotations Sayings

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A man without a woman is like a neck without a pain.
W. C. Fields

A plumber's idea of Cleopatra .
W. C. Fields
On Mae West

A thing worth having is a thing worth cheating for.
W. C. Fields

A woman drove me to drink, and I never even had the courtesy to thank her.
W. C. Fields

Ah, the patter of little feet around the house. There's nothing like having a midget for a butler.
W. C. Fields

After two days in hospital, I took a turn for the nurse.
W. C. Fields

Always carry a flagon of whiskey in case of snakebite and furthermore always carry a small snake.
W. C. Fields

Few things in life are more embarrassing than the necessity of having to inform an old friend that you have just got engaged to his fiancee.
W. C. Fields

Hell, I never vote for anybody, I always vote against.
W. C. Fields

Horse sense is the thing a horse has which keeps it from betting on people.
W. C. Fields

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W. C. Fields - American humorist. Born 1880. Died 1946.