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House M.D. Quotes, House M.D. Funny Quotes, Favorite Houseisms from
TV series |
House MD Quotes
1 - 2 - 3
- 4 - 5 |
House: I don't ask why patients lie, I just assume
they all do.
House, M.D.
House: I've found that when you want to know the truth about
someone, that someone is probably the last person you should
ask.House: Like I always say, there's no 'I' in team. There's
a 'me,' if you jumble it up.
House, M.D.
House: Humanity is overrated.
House, M.D.
House: Tests take time. Treatment's quicker.
House, M.D.
House: No, if you talk to God you're religious. If God talks
to you, you're psychotic.
House, M.D.
House: Sorry. Up late... internet porn.
House, M.D.
Cameron: His wife arranged it as an anniversary present. And
if you ask me, if two people really trust each other, a threesome
every seven years might actually help a marriage.
House: Okay, I say we stop the DDX and discuss that comment.
House, M.D.
House: I'm going in. Rambo style.
House, M.D.
House: It's not what you think! I know it looks like we're cleaning
dishes, but actually, we're having sex.
House, M.D.
Cameron: Could pain medication cause an orgasm?
House: I wish.
House, M.D.
House: I'm too handsome to do paperwork.
House, M.D.
House: You get married at twenty, you're going to be shocked
who you're living with at thirty.
House, M.D.
House: Twenty-year olds fall in and out of love more often than
they change their oil filters. Which they should do more often.
House, M.D.
House: You know I get it if people are just looking for a way
to fill the holes. But they want the holes. They wanna to live
in the holes. And they go nuts when somebody else pours dirt
in their holes. CLIMB OUT OF YOUR HOLES, PEOPLE!
House, M.D.
House: As fascinating as our bodies are, they're also stupid.
House, M.D.
House: I was never that great a math, but next to nothing is
higher than nothing, right?
House, M.D.
House: Patients always want proof, were not making cars
here, we dont give guarantees.
House, M.D.
House: Occam's Razor. The simplest explanation is almost always
somebody screwed up.
House, M.D.
House: That's a catchy diagnosis, you could dance to that.
House, M.D.
House: Idiopathic, from the Latin meaning we're idiots cause
we can't figure out what's causing it.
House, M.D.
House: Never met a diagnostic study I couldn't refute.
House, M.D.
House: If he gets better, I'm right, if he dies, you're right.
House, M.D.
House: It's a basic truth of the human condition that everybody
lies.
House, M.D.
House: There is not a thin line between love and hate. There
is --- in fact --- a Great Wall of China with armed sentries
posted every 20 feet between love and hate.
House, M.D.
House: Bros before hos, man.
House, M.D.
House: Patients sometimes get better. You have no idea why,
but unless you give a reason they won't pay you. Anybody notice
if there's a full moon? ... let's rule out the lunar god and
go from there.
House, M.D.
House: I've found that when you want to know the truth about
someone that someone is probably the last person you should
ask.
House, M.D.
House: Sex could kill you. Do you know what the human body goes
through when you have sex? Pupils dilate, arteries constrict,
core temperature rises, heart races, blood pressure skyrockets,
respiration becomes rapid and shallow, the brain fires bursts
of electrical impulses from nowhere to nowhere and secretions
spit out of every gland, and the muscles tense and spasm like
you're lifting three times your body weight. It's violent, it's
ugly, and it's messy, and if God hadn't made it unbelievably
fun, the human race would have died out eons ago. Men are lucky
they can only have one orgasm. You know women can have an hour
long orgasm?
House, M.D.
House: Truth begins in lies.
House, M.D.
House: Thing is, hopes for sissies.
House, M.D.
House: People don't change.
House, M.D. |
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House MD Quotes
1 - 2 - 3
- 4 - 5 |
House (also known as House, M.D.):
American TV medical drama that debuted on Fox network on November
16, 2004. Central character is Dr. Gregory House (played by Hugh Laurie),
noted for his sarcastic wit and cutting one-liners ("Houseisms).
Other characters include Dr. Lisa Cuddy, Dr. James Wilson and Dr.
Allison Cameron. |
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