Family Guy Quotes, famous Family Guy Quotes Sayings Quotations

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Quotes of the Week - Aug 24, 2010:
"Barack Obama is the worst President in history." -- Ben Quayle, son of former US Vice President.

"He is a bit old." -- Fabio Capello, England soccer coach, saying he doesn't plan to pick David Beckham, 35, for any more competitive matches.

"I am not on the Earth to be bullied by women journalists who envy my freedom, my courage, my talent and my arse. I have a fantastic arse." -- Sinead O'Connor, singer, resents criticism of her recent wedding.

"I'm no Tom Jones but I'm doing better than Nick Clegg." -- UK X Factor finalist Olly Murs, reveals his sexual conquests now number more than 30.

Authors: Family Guy Quotes, Famous Family Guy Quotes Sayings Quotations

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Lois Griffin: I'm gonna go get some oranges Stewie. Here, hold the rest of these bags for mommy.
Stewie Griffin: Oh, what brilliant parenting Lois. Leave a tiny infant with a plastic bag. You know I might asphyxiate myself just to teach you a lesson. Here I go. Just like that boy from INXS…[Stewie tries to put bag over top of his head.] I'm going to do it! [Tries to put bag over left side of his head then climbs into it and tries pulling it over his head.] BLAST! Good Lord Lois, either I was a c-section, or you're Wonder Woman!
Family Guy

Stewie Griffin [in car with Brian, says to police officer]: We met on the Internet. He lured me into the car with promises of candy and funny stories.
Family Guy

Lois Griffin: Peter, my God, you look terrible. What happened?
Peter Griffin [slowly]: I was raped.
Lois Griffin [chuckles]: What?
Peter Griffin: Dr. Hartman violated me. He took my innocence.
Lois Griffin [chuckles harder]: W-What?
[Peter whispers in her ear]
Lois Griffin: Peter, that's a prostate exam. It's an important part of a physical for a man your age.
Peter Griffin: YOU SOUND JUST LIKE HIM! [runs off, sobbing]
Lois Griffin: Fucking idiot.
Family Guy

Chris Griffin: When I stick this army guy with the sharp bayonette up my nose, it tickles my brain. Ha ha ha... ow. Oh, now I don't know math.
Family Guy

Stewie Griffin: By all means, turn me into a child star. Perhaps I can move to Californ-i-ay and wrangle me a three-way with the Olsen twins.
Family Guy

Stewie Griffin: Do the women there have exposed clitorati?
Family Guy

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Family Guy is an American animated television series about the fictional Griffin family in Rhode Island. It was created by Seth MacFarlane for FOX in 1999. .